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A Shot? Or Not? Journal Entry #2

I take shots for one of my AI diseases. I've tried so many biologics over the past 15 years and they all have the very odd side effect of lowering your immune system. You'd think when your body is struggling so hard that the medications wouldn't depress your immune system. But AI diseases tend to be caused by an overactive immune system that's attacking the joints, skin, etc. So I guess it makes sense.

Though I have several joint diseases, the med I take (Taltz) is for my psoriasis. It's one of a few meds of it's kind that only suppresses certain parts of the immune system. It works so well and after you see the picture I'm posting, you'll see why this is important to me.

Yes, this is definitely vanity. But if you don't know, psoriasis is extraordinarily painful and causes a lot of problems. I won't go into it but it's just the worst.

So here is where I'm torn. I need the shot and I need it regularly or it loses efficacy. I already feel places starting to irritate me and I'm only late on my shot by a week. BUT, I always get a sinus & ear infection when I take it, (I also have chronic sinusitis, so there's a big issue). Since I already feel kind of sick, I'm scared to take it. (May I also note I've been on antibiotics twice in a month?)

I literally cannot be the person I need to be for myself and my family if I'm constantly sick. Not to mention the crazy toll it's had on my body to be on antibiotics dozens of times a year, for years.

I know I'd have less problems if I went back to eating a whole food, plant-based diet with no additives; if I worked out all the time; if I got lots of sleep; if I wasn't allergic to my dogs. And technically, all but the last on the list are within my control. But oh my gosh, how unfair is it to have to eat and live perfectly or you're just sick all the time? And how do I do all the things when I'm too exhausted to make time-intensive food and too tired/achy to exercise all the time?

Okay, I guess I'm done venting. Just laying here in bed, acknowledging my sore throat and noting that it feels like I'm sick again. And it really freaking pisses me off. Thank you for listening/reading. I know someone understands and it helps me feel less "stricken" or something.😅

P.S. The pic is from when I couldn't get a handle on my psoriasis (before Taltz) & it was not the worst one I could have selected.

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